Answer truthfully…how do you feel about self care for mums? How often do you take time out? Not at all? Nowhere near enough? Or do you manage it sometimes, but still know you need to find more time for you?
Here’s why self care for busy mums matters so much
Mums do so much. So, so much. Yet they always think they can do even more. They feel guilty if they stop, even for a few minutes. Sitting down, in the day….NO! Going to bed when they’re exhausted….NO WAY, there’s still more chores to do!
But here’s why us busy mums need to take care of ourselves. (That’s us mums of whatever age, with one, two or more children, babies, toddlers, or teens). We can only give our best when we feel at our best. And we frequently feel way less than our best. Sometimes, we forget what our best even felt like.
When we become tired, exhausted, and depleted, we lose something of ourselves. Mums frequently say they can barely remember who they were before they had children. Becoming a mother is certainly a life-changing event, a momentous thing for any woman. We grow very quickly, learning our baby’s, and then our older child’s needs. We very quickly learn to put their needs before our own. There’s probably nobody more selfless than mothers. And that’s the way it has to be.
But when we get tired and neglect our own needs for too long (and we all know it can be VERY long!), we start to lose ourselves, that glimmer and sparkle that makes us who we ARE. We may lose our sense of humour, we may lose our vitality, we may even start to lose that vital empathy and ability to see things from our child’s point of view. Those things that bother them can start to feel so small compared with our own mountainous fatigue. We may become impatient, irritable, or depressed. We may stop enjoying and savouring this time with our children as much as we feel we should (oops, there’s that guilt again!) The sheer wonder of being a parent can start to pass us by, and it can feel like an endless uphill struggle.
So – we need to take time out. It isn’t selfish to look after ourselves from time to time. Who are we kidding if we tell ourselves we can be awake for 20 hours a day, every day, and still be supermum?! Yes, the house might be tidy, but the children crying again will feel like the last straw. Someone else can wash up for a change, someone else can bring in the washing and fold it away. Take those few minutes for yourself, have a sit down with a good book (if you need some inspiration for being mindful as a mother check out some of the books I’ve chosen here) your favourite music, do some exercise, have a lovely warm bath – whatever you need to replenish your energy levels and bring back some of that lovely sparkle that makes you YOU!
Would you like some guidance on taking time for YOU?
Why not join my Calm Mums Club for live and on demand yoga classes, videos and audio recordings of relaxing practices – I’d love to see you there!